What's the best way to get over a break up?

Everything is reminding me of him rn

TheOrionbeltseeker · 36-40, M Best Comment

Give it some time. If you work then go to work and when you are free then get yourself occupied in something for ex - Even SW should do. 2 months and trust me you are good.

Idea is occupy yourself.

TheOrionbeltseeker · 36-40, M

@TheOrionbeltseeker Thanks for the best answer.

SW-User

I meant to write about things like this and how someone can get over it! Whoops.

Okay, so obviously after breaking up with someone you loved you cry your heart out, feel like a blackhole just opened up inside of you, and you can't stop thinking about them. Right.

The first two "symptoms" take time. You start remembering who you were before you met this person like what it is you do day by day. You know, you fall back into being you because you have to keep on living! That isn't the hard part--[i]but oh, the memories![/i]

This is tricky!

I lost a good friend of mine recently two days before Valentine's. Talk about a kick in the stomach! To this day, I still think of her randomly but not in a way that I want her back. [i]I really don't![/i] My mind let her go for good reasons: she was two faced(in a mentally unhinged way), lied to me, and has attempted suicide at least twice that I know of while I was with her (I can put up with this to a degree...she just kept overdosing on painkillers and wouldn't tell me), ect... [i]But the heart wants what the heart wants. [/i]

Mostly my mind would drift to her memory because she was the one that hurt me. We were very much alike so I trusted her very easily, she even told me I could (lie). Until, [i]boom![/i] landmine. I was on my way out with no say. It blindsided me because I actually thought I mattered which I didn't come to find out. So, I couldn't stop thinking about her...

There's really no way around this until your heart finally lets this person go. Accept it but we can't just do that like flicking a switch! It takes time. So what do you do with the memory of someone you loved once that involuntarily hits you?

[i]Think about it! Think of the good times when they brought a smile to your face![/i]

[b]Do NOT let your mind drift to the moment you lost them!

No...[/b]stay with the honey, so to speak. Then once you can stop thinking about them, do something else, think about something else, ect... I know that's hard to do but you will get better at it!

This way you purge your brain of them, let it process, and you can be on your way. :) I can testify to that personally. I still think of them occasionally but it doesn't feel like I'm dying. It gets a little bit more blase in time.

What is this technique that takes so much mental agility and practice? It's called Joy.

I have been meaning to write more extensively about it, I definitely will on my profile, but you needed to hear about it first.

SW-User

Remember it's just a person.... nor more not less. One tends to make them greater than they are.

Avoid contact with him, and write all the bad and good things of that person and relationship. To be objective.
And why did it end. Objectively.

Beebo · M

Stay active, no matter what. But don't do what many do by finding another relationship just to compensate the loss feelings.

wintersecret · 41-45, M

take his picture, burn it and flush it in the toilet

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AliceMortem · 31-35, F

@wintersecret I don't hate him I just want to stop thinking about him

wintersecret · 41-45, M

@SW-User :P well worth a try though

wintersecret · 41-45, M

@AliceMortem still he will comeback in ur mind so a thing to get it out is to flush out

Newandimproved · 61-69, M

two schools of thought:
1) the best way to get over somebody is to get under somebody else and
2) have an unashamed pity party with your girlfriends and let them tell you what a jerk he is and how you are better off without him. there can be copious amounts of ice cream/pizza/booze - talk about him until you're sick of hearing his name.

either way...it'll take you a while to get over it. he was a part of your life.

Miram · 31-35, F

Treat yourself better than he treated you.

User41 · 36-40, M

🤔

Re-center yourself around the person you were before him.

Re evaluate the person you want to be.

Re evaluate the person you want to be with. Based on his failures and your failures. An be honest with what you failed at.

Now, carry on smartly.

indyjoe · 56-60, M

You must've really loved him, the thoughts will never completely go away (good or bad). However they will fade and not haunt you as much...just give it time. A new relationship is a good remedy too (when you're ready of course).✌🤠

Mugin16 · 46-50, M

Give time the time to heal :-)

Meet your friends for some common activities, watch a movie, visit a museum, join a club or association, meet new people, dress up and go out, maybe some retail therapy? :-)