If you love someone, but you were toxic in their life, would it be best to force yourself out of the relationship, knowing they would be happier?

Even if they wanted you to stay?

That only causes more hurt. You at least owe them an explanation. But if they really mean something to you- then CHANGE.

SW-User

@VioletShadows I agree with this, but if they cannot or won't then at least set them free.

CallmeHopelessNotRomantic · 46-50, F

I've gotta say, if I knew enough to know that I was toxic to them, I'd know enough to change that behavior.

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CallmeHopelessNotRomantic · 46-50, F

@TranscendentOne well, I've had my share of relationships where the other person was toxic. Most days I just wanted to run and hide from everyone. It depends on the level of toxicity. Most of the time use not worth it.

TranscendentOne · 31-35, M

@CallmeHopelessNotRomantic I have also been in many toxic relationships. And I dont want to do to her what others did to me. And it scares me that I already have

CallmeHopelessNotRomantic · 46-50, F

@TranscendentOne nothing sends me running away faster than the thought of hurting someone the way I've been hurt by others.

Babyblue

Depends. Can you just abandon someone you really love? Even if it destroys their soul? :(

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Babyblue

@TranscendentOne i just want him

TranscendentOne · 31-35, M

But you shouldn't sacrifice yourself to have him. It may seem like you can't live without him, but you can. And you should. It is hard as hell to get out. But it is going to be the best

Babyblue

@TranscendentOne I don't agree

SW-User

why wouldnt you work on yourself.. its easier to change yourself than hoping the other person to change

TranscendentOne · 31-35, M

@SW-User Because even if I change, I am afraid of hurting her

SW-User

Sometimes,it just don't work and if you make each other miserable then it really isn't working

SStarfish ·

No. That will make them sad.. You should explain yourself to them

TranscendentOne · 31-35, M

@SStarfish But she doesn't fully understand. Nor can I really explain it to her. She sees what she wants to see. Nothing more.

SW-User

I think you should get an outside perspective because you could be wrong, and you should let your partner have the agency to decide what they want for themselves.

Cutiepi23

Difficult one but in the end it would end if it was toxic. So best getting out before the nastiness sets in.

Starcrossed · 41-45, F

I left. It destroyed me, but was better than destroying him anymore.

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