I Hate Myself

I DO BELIEVE THAT THE ONES WHO FEEL SO MUCH HATRED, AT ONCE THEY GAVE LOVE SO MUCH. MAYBE IT'S A SITUATION, OR PEOPLE OR SUCH CERTAIN THINGS TURNED THAT LOVE INTO HATE. I ALSO FEEL THE SAME SHIT. I AM IN THE PROCESS OF DEALING WITH THAT HATRED. WE CALL OURSELVES IDIOT, MORON, STUPID WE BLAME OURSELVES FOR IT BECAUSE WE LET OUR EMOTIONS LEAD US.
I WANT TO TELL YOU THIS AND ALSO TO MYSELF AS WE FEEL THE SAME THING.
WE ARE NOT IDIOTS MAYBE WE DO SOME SHIT THINGS BUT IT DOESN'T MEAN WE ARE IDIOTS.
MAYBE WE ARE BIT OF SELFISH BUT I DON'T THINK IT'S WRONG FOR US TO HOPE OR WISH FOR SOMEONE TO LOVE AND APPRECIATE US.
INDEED WE ARE DISGUSTING BECAUSE WE FEEL HATE TO OURSELVES THAT WE FEEL IT'S UNFAIR FOR US THAT THEY ARE HAPPY AND WE ARE NOT.
IT IS ALL WRONG FOR US TO LET OUR ANGER AND EMOTIONS TO CONTROL US.
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I HAVE BEEN THINKING LATELY IS THAT.. MAYBE IT'S TIME FOR A CHANGE. IDK HOW CAUSE I AM CURRENTLY STILL FIGURING IT OUT. BUT MAYBE WE HAVE TO LET GO THINGS AND ACCEPT WHAT'S ALREADY DONE AND SAID.
YES MAYBE IT'S ALL OUR FAULT. BUT IF WE KEEP ON BLAMING OURSELVES FOR ALL OF IT INSTEAD OF LEARNING FROM IT WE WILL NEVER MOVE ON, WE WILL ALWAYS GET TIRED TO DEAL WITH OVER AND OVER AGAIN WHEN IN FACT WE HAVE OTHER CHOICES.
I HOPE YOU FIND YOUR WAY BACK TO LOVING YOURSELF AGAIN, AND TO ME IDK IF I'LL EVER FIND A WAY BACK BECAUSE I STILL DEAL WITH THIS SHIT MANY TIMES AND SO FAR THIS IS WHAT I LEARNED FROM DEALING SUCH HUGE HATRED, AND I TELL YOU IT'S A VERY DIFFICULT FIGHT AGAINST ONESELF.

You are what you think you are. you have it in your hands. You can decide if you think negative or positive..