I Feel That Something Is Missing From My Life
Lately, I haven't been feeling the most upbeat. There is so much going on that I am feeling very overwhelmed about.
I'm moving to Texas in about a week. My on and off boyfriend just moved to Arizona and he keeps telling me how much he misses me and wants me to come to Arizona instead.
The truth is, I don't want to be with him anymore and I am glad that him and I are going to be apart. I have been telling him that I miss him too and that I still want to be with him and that I want us to get married, but it's all a lie.
He was terrible to me for the time that we dated (2.5 years).
He treated me in ways a man should never treat his woman. He was abusive in every sense of the word.
I'm happy that I am free from him. The only reason why I'm telling him that I miss him and want to be with him is because I feel sorry for him. I know he is going through a tough time and want to be there for him. I'm just that type of person.
Now the next thing is for some reason, lately I've been wanting to have a baby so bad. I don't know what's going on with me. I really want a family. I want a husband and like 2-3 children. I'm only 19 and I've always told myself that I wouldn't have children until I've finished school, gotten married, and have bought a house, but I don't know if I can wait that long. Like, I really want children now. It's so weird.
A lot of my friends and family members are having children this year, so all on my social medias all I see are baby pictures and they all seem so happy. I really hope this is a phase, because, even though I want children, I don't think it's a good idea to have them now.
I have this empty feeling in my life right now. I'm so stressed and anxious.
:(
I'm moving to Texas in about a week. My on and off boyfriend just moved to Arizona and he keeps telling me how much he misses me and wants me to come to Arizona instead.
The truth is, I don't want to be with him anymore and I am glad that him and I are going to be apart. I have been telling him that I miss him too and that I still want to be with him and that I want us to get married, but it's all a lie.
He was terrible to me for the time that we dated (2.5 years).
He treated me in ways a man should never treat his woman. He was abusive in every sense of the word.
I'm happy that I am free from him. The only reason why I'm telling him that I miss him and want to be with him is because I feel sorry for him. I know he is going through a tough time and want to be there for him. I'm just that type of person.
Now the next thing is for some reason, lately I've been wanting to have a baby so bad. I don't know what's going on with me. I really want a family. I want a husband and like 2-3 children. I'm only 19 and I've always told myself that I wouldn't have children until I've finished school, gotten married, and have bought a house, but I don't know if I can wait that long. Like, I really want children now. It's so weird.
A lot of my friends and family members are having children this year, so all on my social medias all I see are baby pictures and they all seem so happy. I really hope this is a phase, because, even though I want children, I don't think it's a good idea to have them now.
I have this empty feeling in my life right now. I'm so stressed and anxious.
:(
26-30, F
