I Got Something To Say

I know how a broken heart feels .. slow suicide .. it burns from inside .. makes you weak .. makes you cry .. and makes you push through the pain or just ignore it .. this is how it makes me feel .. sometimes it gives me strength and motivation to push myself forward and other times .. it brings me down to my knees .. crying to god to heal it .. cos it hurts like nothing I've ever felt before .. it's something I always think it went away but everytime it comes back .. it defeats me .. makes me grasp for some air.. it makes me run out of breath .. makes me want to fall and give up .. or scream all the pain out .. it makes me angry .. it makes me feel so powerless ... and yet other times I am thankful for this pain .. for feeling it inside of me .. like I feel I am alive .. other times I'm just numb .. and sometimes.. I find a reason to keep strong and carry on .. even though I carry this fire inside of me .. I drag myself out of my own misery.. I ask god for help .. cos I only trust him that much .. and he gives me patience .. I get that strength from my faith in god .. and that's enough for me ..