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I Sometimes Wonder What the Hell Is Wrong With People

[center][big]Rape is Natural … really?!?[/big][/center]


Well, this is actually my second attempt at writing this story. The first didn't meet EP's community guidelines and my appeal was unsuccessful. However, EPKimi told me to resubmit so here I am. I suspect the reason the first story was rejected was that I quoted extensively from the EP conversation that prompted me to write this story in the first place. Therefore I've removed most of those quotes and replaced them with a link to where you can find the original conversation (for as long as EP allows such filth to stay in place).

So what is all this about you ask? Well, I met someone on EP a few weeks ago by the name of Pywacket. His views on life could not be more different than mine, which, if you know me, means I wanted to understand him better. He posted a story describing a hypothetical future proof (in the form of a news article) that God does not exist. In his story, he asks Christians, “What will you do then?” So I responded, as I often do on this subject. If you want to read the original story by Mr Pywacket and all the story comments in context, go here: <a href="http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Believe-In-God/5627569" target="ep_blank">EP Link</a>

What followed was 179 pages worth of comments filled with hatred and venom and false claims and just unbelievable animosity toward anyone, especially me, that professed any faith in the Christian God. That’s fine. I run into attitudes like this every day here on campus; I’m used to it. But then Mr Pywacket started digging through my profile and for some reason latched onto my story from 2012 about my ex-boyfriend trying to force me to have sex.

He took excerpts from my 2012 story and its comments and started including them in his responses. Yup, in our discussion on whether or not God existed and whether or not Christianity was a vile and wicked faith, he started sprinkling in disgusting references to that day. I allowed myself to get way too involved in that conversation and I have since pulled out of the conversation completely. However, I need to draw attention to one aspect of it, because I have heard this same attitude toward sexual assault here on campus as well and it concerns me.

There is actually a school of thought out there that we are all just animals anyway and rape is part of the natural order. Yup, you read that right. I have heard these words uttered in person by guys standing in front of me. Of course, in person, such people profess that they would never do such a thing and that societal constructs prohibiting such behavior are mostly a good thing, but that it is none-the-less part of the natural order. Yup. I’ve had these conversations with guys. It’s scary.


It’s scary because it accepts that sexual assault is inevitable and natural and simply part of being the animal that we all are. I don’t want to put words in Mr Pywacket's mouth, so here are a couple of excerpts:
-- “If you weren't such an ignorant religious fanatic you would understand that a hard-wired biological imperative millions of years in the making, and passed down through the evolution of the species was driving his thoughts, his speech, and his actions. And there isn't a damn thing wrong with it. Your body is 'designed' through evolution to be raped and survive it.”
-- “Nature rewards female for being raped.”
-- “Not that long ago, he would have ignored your protests and simply overpowered you, as men have done for 200,000 years. And you would have gotten over it, and wanted him to do it again and again and again.”
-- “Had he accomplished the rape, you would have been all upset because of your beliefs, but you would also have the memory of how good it felt.”


Yes, folks, you read that right:
-- my body was designed through evolution to be raped,
-- nature rewards me for it,
-- if my ex-boyfriend had been successful I’d have wanted it (rape) again and again,
-- and I would have been left with fond memories
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


In my original story I stopped about here intending to let you, the reader, draw your own conclusions and to hopefully start a dialog. However, I’ve since had another week of interaction with Mr Pywacket. In this extra fun-filled week, he has expressed some observations specifically about childhood sexual assault. He gets offended when I call them opinions or beliefs or even conclusions. They are simply his observations of fact. These next quotes (below) come from comments he made on my story about my love for my girlfriend: <a href="http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Want-To-Find-My-Soulmate/5672914" target="ep_blank">EP Link</a>

The story comments drifted far from anything remotely related to the original post and it bothers me that a story like this is ruined by this type of crap. I am very close to violating one of my personal standards here on EP and just going and deleting all his comments on that story. For now, they are there. So here you go, Mr Pywacket on the topic of childhood sexual abuse:
-- “So the millions of girls who had sex with adults and DIDN'T have your experience are all lying? The millions who did NOT have health problems? The millions who loved the sex? The millions who looked forward to it? All wrong?”
-- “I have told you to go to Pandora's and read what the experts have to say. About the girls who had sex starting when they were very very young ... and loved it. And didn't want it to stop. Little girls who instigated it. Initiated it. Yes, they even knew they shouldn't be doing it. But they wanted to. And they did it for years. And never got caught.”
(These comments were directed to some else, not me, who had survived childhood sexual abuse.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


So where does this leave us? How do we respond to attitudes like this? And when I say “we”, I am not referring to “Christians” or to “Humanists”; I am referring to any of us that believe in a just society. I am referring to any of us that believes we all, as human beings, have a right to feel secure in our surroundings.


I currently live on a fairly well known, northeastern USA university campus. My school goes to great lengths to ensure that we all know how to be safe because there is an unacceptable level of sexual violence on American campuses, but that doesn’t even compare to what is happening around the world.
-- We are now one year out from the kidnapping and sexual enslavement of the 200+ school girls in Nigeria by Boko Haram. I hope you’ve tweeted the hash tag: #BringBackOurGirls. I did. Many times. And will continue to.
-- When ISIS stormed Yazidi Iraq, many of the men were forcibly converted to Islam but the girls were sold into sexual slavery to be raped again and again. I wonder how many of them have fond memories of their rapes as Mr Pywacket would have us believe.


I am posting this simply to raise awareness and spur discussion. I think Mr Pywacket’s perspective on and attitude toward rape is dangerous. If he were an isolated voice, then I wouldn't give it another thought, but, as I stated above, I hear this attitude here on campus. I think it is partially behind the problem we have on American university campuses now. Sexual assault is treated by some as inevitable or excusable or simply part of the human condition. Treating it as such lessens the strength of the “society constructs prohibiting such behavior” and essentially encourages it. Yup, this is just my opinion and I have no data to back it up, but I do believe attitudes like Pywacket’s to be very dangerous.


[sep][sep][sep]

[b]About me: [/b]https://similarworlds.com/sarabee1995/info
This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »
TheGreatLeveler
Sara, I've browsed through some of the exchanges you've had with pywacket while reading your previous story. I can only conclude that he must have a few screws loose in his head. What exactly has your experience with your ex-boyfriend to do with a discussion on religion? I can't think of anything. Not only is it completely irrelevant to the topic, it's also rather tasteless to bring something like that up in a conversation. For someone who claims to be so certain of his case, he sure likes to refer to multiple personal issues of himself and the ones he's interacting with. If anything, that strikes me as someone who's rather uncertain of his case. Maybe he just enjoys acting like a jerk, while blaming every religious person for everything that went wrong in his life.


As for his perception on rape, I find it hard to take any of that seriously. While I completely agree that sexual assault isn't being taken as serious as it should be and that there are quite a lot of people with ignorant, or simply misguided perceptions and attitudes about rape, I don't think there are many students on campuses that would align themselves with any of pywacket his statements. Don't get me wrong, I do think it needs to receive more attention. I just don't think there are many people like pywacket running around on campus. It's true that nature doesn't have a biological consent mechanism, but that doesn't make sexual assault any less wrong. Neither does the way we are biologically wired make such a thing "inevitable" or "excusable". As the species with the highest level of self-awareness we always have a choice. We can opt to ignore or exploit any animalistic instinct or desire we are wired with. I think he's greatly underestimating and ignoring the psychological traumas, which victims of sexual abuse continually suffer from throughout their life’s. I haven't heard of pandora's project before, but I find it hard to believe that a nonprofit organization, meant for survivors of sexual assault, would have a similar attitude towards rape and I strongly doubt it he has done any substantial research on the topic.


I think you did the right thing to cease contact with this person. Nothing good will come of any further interaction with him. He will just continue to press his case in the same manner he has done so before. I'm not a big proponent of censure measures here either, but in your situation I think I would've removed his comments. They have nothing to do with your story, are disrespectful and insulting, towards you and your friends.
sarabee1995 · 26-30, F
Thank you so much for the comments. I know we don't interact much, but I've never doubted my decision to add you to my circle.


You're right that his attitude is not common on my campus, but let me repeat: Pywacket is not the first person I've heard this reasoning from. When I read his words here, I immediately recognized the logic chain from previous conversations here on campus. Again, not common, but present. And in my opinion, dangerous.


Oh, and I pulled myself out of the initial conversation referenced at the beginning of my story above, but I have not ceased all contact with him. In fact, I would welcome him here if he feels I've misrepresented or misquoted him in any way. I am open to civil discussion of any issue with anyone. That is why I am here.
sarabee1995 · 26-30, F
Py -- For the record, my first draft of this story included a big section of our story comments to each other so that these things could be viewed in context. In general, I do NOT like quotes being taken out of context. However, some of the things you said (probably the reference to my "vagina" and other things) cause EP to reject the story so I had no choice but to leave out the context. I don't think I have mis-represented your views here though.
PYWACKET
I think, when I have a little more time, I'm going to dismantle this long post from the GreatLeveler.

I'm curious to see if he/she can hold up in a rational discussion.

I'm going to guess up front that the answer is no.

Sometimes there are just too many idiots to deal with. I'm only one person and addressing all the crap these people put out is time consuming.
PYWACKET
Mr. Leveler, just a small point. These are issues I have researched for quite a few years. I don't state a fact unless I'm absolutely sure it IS a fact. Generally I include links to the source(s) of my facts.

You, by contrast, don't seem to feel your opinions require support. You don't 'think' there are many college students who would align themselves with any of my statements. Hmm. I'll go you one better. I would be very surprised if ANY college students aligned themselves with any of my statements. Unless of course, they want to hounded out of school. At best. And that would be just the beginning. Assuming we are talking about a male student, he would be lucky if he wasn't beaten by well-meaning defenders of feminine virtue. To death. His face would be plastered across every social media site. His parents, siblings, extended family would all know about it. And they would hear from all the people in their circles. The animosity directed toward his family could end up costing his parents their jobs. His younger siblings might have to change schools. The firestorm could very well end up attracting the attention of the national media.

There would be the usual hate mail ... including death threats.

Some boys might decide to rape his younger sister, just to make it more 'personal' for him.

Getting a job? Forget it. Nobody is going to hire this sick predator.

No Mr. Leveler, I don't think there will be 'many' who will align themselves.

Of course, that's why researchers have college students participate anonymously.

And the ANONYMOUS polls and surveys reveal that around HALF of male college students are willing to admit ANONYMOUSLY that they would RAPE a girl if they believed they would get away with it.

Now tell me, Mr. Leveler ... is this a 'perception' of mine? An 'opinion'? A 'view'? A 'belief'? An 'attitude'?

You can try to discredit ME until hell freezes over. It's not going to invalidate the research studies. It's not going to throw them under a pall of suspicion. I didn't do the studies. I simply report on them.

Sara brings up these horrific cases of violent kidnappings and rapes.

Really Sara? Did I say this is ok? No. I did not.

You are a shameless liar Sara. Do you even HAVE any morals?

Not only are you willing to go to any lengths to try to discredit me, but you have the fucking audacity to imply that what you experienced is similar to their experiences.

Sara, how could you dare to even hint that the experiences of these poor terrorized girls has ANY relationship whatsoever to your 'so-called' attempted rape?

It's sickening. Absolutely sickening.

I said females have evolved to survive rape. Even little girls will survive being raped by an adult. Very little girls.

It's extremely rare when a child dies from rape.

Sara (and the Christian conservatives ... and feminists) would have us believe that it's an act of violence. The rapist wants to hurt the victim. The rapist hates the victim. It's not about sex. It's about humiliating the victim. Making the victim suffer as much as possible.

So Sara. That what was going through the mind of your boyfriend?

He just wanted to hurt you? He hated you? Wanted to humiliate you? Wasn't about sexual pleasure?

Too funny.
PYWACKET
Mr. Leveler sir. Do YOU have a computer? Oh good. Then why don't you PROVE I'M LYING? It's really easy to do.

YOU go to Pandoras and read what they tell the 'survivors' of CSA.

Pandora and I do not share the same 'attitude'.

They are very much against it. I am not in FAVOR of it, but I do recognize how powerful the biological drive is.