What self-sabotaging things do you do in relationships/friendships?

I have never gotten over anyone in my life really , neither ex friends nor lovers , even if I ended the relantionship . I completely obsess over people even though I don't let it show and hardly ever admit it . The way relationships are created in my life is mostly with me acting passively hoping they want to "discover"me , but also by completely sabotaging the process. There I said it .