Dream job but the hiring manager was kind of rude - is this a red flag?

I went to the final stage interview for my supposed dream job. For the most part the interview went well. It got to the part where I asked the hiring manager questions, I asked a number of them then asked “how would you describe yourself as a manager and how do you think your team would describe you?”. The hiring manager asked me “do you think this is relevant to our conversation?”... floored.

I proceeded to justify my question explaining it was important for me to get an understanding of their management style and I asked how the team would describe him/her as I heard great things about them etc etc... the hiring manager then said they was only teasing after they saw the panic on my face and laughed but I don’t think they was at all. In fact the hiring manage made a throw away comment about it sounded like I was interviewing him/her instead of it being the other way around.

I have been quite reluctant about this position due to the flakiness of the hiring manager sticking to agreed interview time, my pay would remain the same etc etc. Isn’t this odd?

I am really keen to leave my current job but I will not leave out of desperation this time around. Don’t get be wrong the hiring manager was lovely overall but that awkward moment is really a red flag for me.

Am I over thinking it?

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Mamapolo2016 · F

How I would read this would be dependent on circumstances.

First, did you ask your questions at the END of the interview or in the middle, while the interviewer was still following his script?

Second, will that particular person be anywhere in your chain of command, should you get/accept the job? If not, his management style isn't relevant.

Third, how many questions did you ask and what % of the interview was devoted to them?

Finally, when someone said something to me like, "Sounds like you're interviewing me instead of the other way around, my answer was, "I am. At a minimum, I spend more time during the week at work and going to work than I do with my family. Just like with shoes, a good fit is important."

outsidethebox18 · 31-35, F

@Mamapolo2016 Yes I asked my questions at the end.
% of questions I asked to the hiring manager was 30% about them. Like why did they start the company, management style... I obviously meant no harm AT ALL. I just wanted to understand them better. Yes your answer is what I also said but more so along the lines of it’s important me and my managers get a long. Well the hiring manager is like the CEO, there are about 7 different people in two corporate titles below their position. So, I don’t think interaction will be many BUT it is a small team.

I am just nervous. They asked to see samples of my writing style so I’ll find out next week if I’m successful but I’m just not sure I even want the job. I don’t like my current job but I know what I’m up against if anything. This is a whole new and very niche world. I’m scared. I’ve been emotionally batterd at work that I can not afford another horrible or intense boss. I won’t dedicate anymore money to therapy. Further, the pay. Imagine being on 35K even with a corporate title promotion and that salary will not change until next promotion AND there are at least 6-8 people who will get promoted before you (assuredly) because they have been there longer. I’m just not sure...

QuixoticSoul · 41-45, M

If they were simply teasing, that's one thing - sometimes humor can get lost in the mix. It's hard to say, sometimes and awkward moment is an awkward moment. But a bad boss can ruin any job.

outsidethebox18 · 31-35, F

@QuixoticSoul yeah she really laughed about it but I’m not sure! I just felt so awkward. Overall it was a decent interview.
I wouldn’t care if I didn’t get the job though

LyricalOne · F

I’m sure it was awkward for him/her too as it did sound like you were interviewing them.

QuixoticSoul · 41-45, M

@LyricalOne But this is normal. The interview is *supposed* to go both ways. When I'm interviewing - the company and the team better impress me or I'm walking right out.

outsidethebox18 · 31-35, F

@LyricalOne I suppose so but they did say it’s okay to ask since I should know what I’m getting in for. I don’t know I just have a sour taste in my mouth.

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