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We’ve all been invited to an extremely swish black tie dinner 11th December to thank us for our hard work to get the company up & running...

... this past year. Well, all but one; the guy I work with directly. Without him I’d have been dead in the water. All of us would, I really believe that.

But the top management don’t like him & now he’s inviteless.

If I go I hurt him & if I don’t go I hurt myself, career wise.

Ugh. What should I do?
SW-User
Huh? They missed inviting him? That sounds like bullying tbh
SW-User
It sounds fking awful.god knows what else he’s putting up with. If I were him I’d resign and go for constructive dismissal @SevenTierCrazyCake
@SW-User @SW-User No! I need him here. I can’t do three peoples jobs. I’m already literally doing two.
SW-User
Get a new job luv xx@SevenTierCrazyCake
SW-User
That is appalling management.

However for you... go...


But I'd offer to take him out for a celebration of his help to me out of the sight of management.

Thirdly. I'd look for another job if that is how they treat people. Today him tomorrow you?
@SW-User I’m only still here because it’s part of a very specific five year plan. I know what’s happening. & am lucky enough to be out of the thrall most of the time. I am the only person here (luckily for me) who knows how to do my job. So, they need me. It could take them up six months to get a replacement. So, they leave me alone & they place nice.
SW-User
@SevenTierCrazyCake watch your back sounds very toxic environment. My experience of them is they are also very volatile as well. I'd keep an escape/insurance plan in place.
@SW-User already set
SW-User
You should decide whether you care about being fair or being a winner.

Not that it has to be one or the other. Sounds like a childish situation. Isolation isn’t right, especially when the person has helped you.
@SW-User I cant. It’s not a party, it’s a dinner party
SW-User
@SevenTierCrazyCake, have you tried asking someone why he wasn’t included? Making a point to announce that it’s made you uncomfortable?
@SW-User apparently it’s for people who went above & beyond. Somehow him work till 1am every day for months doesn’t count.

The big bosses just don’t like him
HeavenBesideYou · 56-60, F
What a shitty thing to do, really. Personally I probably wouldn’t go. Who wants to rub elbows with people like that?

And I’d be looking for another job.
HeavenBesideYou · 56-60, F
@SevenTierCrazyCake lol. Maybe you should just bring him with you, going on the assumption everyone had been invited.
@HeavenBesideYou interesting idea.
HeavenBesideYou · 56-60, F
GLITTER · 36-40, F
Sounds like my life right now. I’m so that guy 😂
@GLITTER oh, honey. I’m sorry.

I feel sick to my stomach with it.
SW-User
I'd look for a new job. I don't like the sound of your managers.
@SW-User not mine either. I think. I’ve never been to one. I do however have no choice.
SW-User
@SevenTierCrazyCake Sounds fun 😐
@SW-User yay
consider working somewhere else
if they did it to him, they could just as easily do it to you
ScarletWitch · 26-30, F
Unless you're dating. Go to the party. But know you are the one with a gold heart.
@ScarletWitch I’ve no choice anyway. I have to go.
nedkelly · 61-69, M
I would not be attending as I refuse to dress up for anyone
@nedkelly that’s fair. But I’m sa touch girly so the dressing up isn’t an issue for me.
He can be your plus one
@DarlingSelah unfortunately not. It’s a sit down, four course, Black tie dinner for twenty-two people. All the big wigs... & then me. 😬
What a crap thing to do.

I would talk to the guy, tell him that you are caught between supporting him and the need to balance your own career.

I would also say, however,to the top management that this is exluding a colleague and is not right and it is not in the spirirt of the company/teamwork/christmas etc.

Idk
@InOtterWords good advice.

We’ve all argreed to leave it a little while in the hope an invite turns up. I certainly don’t want to tell him on a Friday anyway. He’ll stew about it all weekend.

 
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