What is your favorite 'dad joke'? 🤔

Wife and Kids: "Yay, tomorrow we leave for our beach vacation!"
Dad: "Who the fuck are you people and why are you in my bed?"

A man is walking in a graveyard
when he hears the Third Symphony played backward.
When it’s over, the Second Symphony starts playing,
also backward,
and then the First.


“What’s going on?” he asks a cemetery worker.






“It’s Beethoven,” says the worker. “He’s decomposing.”

What do you call a bird hiding in the leaves?





Rustle Crow

I bought shoes from a drug dealer once. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day.

Dude, how's your wife and my kids?

Ouch lol

......An apple pie in Jamaica is £1.50, a cherry pie in Barbados is £1.60 and a mince pie in Trinidad is £1.80. These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

This morning I was wondering where the sun was, but then it dawned on me.