Need help with my story.
I don't know how people on a first encounter/date talk...i was trying to also think of something witty for her response. Also I have worries of how I started the conversation or their interaction in the 3rd paragraph. Thanks.
Story:
It was on that day, October 25th, 1999, that I, Liza, found myself waiting for an answer that could change my entire world. To this day, I remember it just as clearly. I was 21 at the time in my senior year of college. Eric and I had been going on strong for 3 straight years and the relationship with my family was strained at best. Through those years me and Eric would have rare opportunities where we’d have a day to ourselves, but most of the times we'd be juggling between our jobs and school. This specific day though was not one of those days, this day was unlike any other because this day i’d finally have The truth to what I've been asking myself all these years. “Where do we stand and where do we go from here?” thinking of the answer, the honesty and truth it would've held in it all made it that much harder to breathe. It was then that i knew just how i got here, and from the very beginning it never crossed my mind in the slightest.
It begun my freshman year of college. It had been bit of a blur as i day-in and day-out followed what i Believed i was destined to do, though this was not the case when it came to what i had actually envisioned for myself. The few days i do remember hold a sentimental significance to me in my everyday, and ironically ‘sentimental’ is the word i could come to summarize this whole story. Anyway let me continue, it was the week before our midterms and we were all preparing for the worst. We’d set up a tradition for the whole group to meet once every week at each others homes for hour-long study sessions. This time it was Sarah H.’s turn to host our get-together, and everybody knew that when you were invited to Sarah H.’s house you were in for quite the treat. The group had drickled in gradually, with Luke being the first, then Casey, Edward, Lennard, and Ruth. We all sat and made ourselves comfortable around Sarah’s coffee table. “Luke my boy how's number 6 coming along for you?” Lennard boomed from across the room. Luke lifted his gaze and gave Lennard a small shrug. “Wow! Tumbleweeds huh?...” Lennard then gave a look of disappointment as he shook his head and returned back to his work. “Oh Liza i forgot to tell you! someone asked about you in my analytics class...his name was Eric i think.” Eric? I don’t know any Erics. “Ruth I told you to stop giving strangers my number?!” Ruth rolls her eyes in annoyance “Liza you need to get out more, live a little!” That was easy for her to say when she was all party and no commitment. “That's alright, I'm very much dead anyway.” Ruth frowned and diverted her attention from me to her work. “Fine forget I said anything…” There it was, her same old shtick that she used to guilt trip me. “Are you serious!” She gave a small sigh and continued her work in silence. “Fine I'll do it! We’ll get coffee...are we hunky-dory now?” Now pleased with what I finally had said, she gave me a smile. “Of course…”
Later that week Eric and I planned to meet each other for coffee at Durcies, the weather that day was gloomy as dark clouds shrouded the skies and rain drenched the ground. The rain trickled down so subtly then ceased every couple moments to reassure me it wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. I found myself there walking past the window, locking eyes with the boy i knew only as Eric. He greeted me with a smile and gestured me to take a seat. “Liza was it?” he asked earnestly (<<--is the part "he asked earnestly" ok to leave in? let me know please.)
Story:
It was on that day, October 25th, 1999, that I, Liza, found myself waiting for an answer that could change my entire world. To this day, I remember it just as clearly. I was 21 at the time in my senior year of college. Eric and I had been going on strong for 3 straight years and the relationship with my family was strained at best. Through those years me and Eric would have rare opportunities where we’d have a day to ourselves, but most of the times we'd be juggling between our jobs and school. This specific day though was not one of those days, this day was unlike any other because this day i’d finally have The truth to what I've been asking myself all these years. “Where do we stand and where do we go from here?” thinking of the answer, the honesty and truth it would've held in it all made it that much harder to breathe. It was then that i knew just how i got here, and from the very beginning it never crossed my mind in the slightest.
It begun my freshman year of college. It had been bit of a blur as i day-in and day-out followed what i Believed i was destined to do, though this was not the case when it came to what i had actually envisioned for myself. The few days i do remember hold a sentimental significance to me in my everyday, and ironically ‘sentimental’ is the word i could come to summarize this whole story. Anyway let me continue, it was the week before our midterms and we were all preparing for the worst. We’d set up a tradition for the whole group to meet once every week at each others homes for hour-long study sessions. This time it was Sarah H.’s turn to host our get-together, and everybody knew that when you were invited to Sarah H.’s house you were in for quite the treat. The group had drickled in gradually, with Luke being the first, then Casey, Edward, Lennard, and Ruth. We all sat and made ourselves comfortable around Sarah’s coffee table. “Luke my boy how's number 6 coming along for you?” Lennard boomed from across the room. Luke lifted his gaze and gave Lennard a small shrug. “Wow! Tumbleweeds huh?...” Lennard then gave a look of disappointment as he shook his head and returned back to his work. “Oh Liza i forgot to tell you! someone asked about you in my analytics class...his name was Eric i think.” Eric? I don’t know any Erics. “Ruth I told you to stop giving strangers my number?!” Ruth rolls her eyes in annoyance “Liza you need to get out more, live a little!” That was easy for her to say when she was all party and no commitment. “That's alright, I'm very much dead anyway.” Ruth frowned and diverted her attention from me to her work. “Fine forget I said anything…” There it was, her same old shtick that she used to guilt trip me. “Are you serious!” She gave a small sigh and continued her work in silence. “Fine I'll do it! We’ll get coffee...are we hunky-dory now?” Now pleased with what I finally had said, she gave me a smile. “Of course…”
Later that week Eric and I planned to meet each other for coffee at Durcies, the weather that day was gloomy as dark clouds shrouded the skies and rain drenched the ground. The rain trickled down so subtly then ceased every couple moments to reassure me it wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. I found myself there walking past the window, locking eyes with the boy i knew only as Eric. He greeted me with a smile and gestured me to take a seat. “Liza was it?” he asked earnestly (<<--is the part "he asked earnestly" ok to leave in? let me know please.)
22-25, M
