I know it’s never easy to smile when your life feels like tore apart, fall apart. As if there is no use of living. You don’t feel like living, you just use your body and fill it with food and water everyday, there is no happiness in your day, you fake smile, you fake laugh like.. ha.. ha.. it’s a [u]zonk[/u]. It’s nothing. Ask yourself when was the last time you laugh until your tummy hurts? If it’s been a while or you can’t even remember when. Then I think you and me are on the same boat.
You know you go to school cause you have to, you have to be so good in school so when you finished you can get a proper job, and after that you will have to pay bills, or you will eventually meet someone and get married (if we are lucky).
You married and all of sudden after quite a while, things don't feel the same anymore, it gets boring, wait can I say boring word? It gets flat. Maybe you just get to the point where your spouse is no longer understand you. Who am I marrying with? The question will be there, but don’t give up yet.
You go to work cause you have to, you have to pay your bills, you have to impress people, maybe? And it keep repeating for the rest of your life. So that's all? Where is the passion? Where is the excitement? Where is the butterfly tickling in your tummy? Most of the important, where is your dream? Where is the purpose?
I heard people say [i]“dream and goal will make your life better”[/i] “dream will gives you passion, passion will creates excitement, excitement will give you energy to try new things somehow a positive one” maybe we should make plan, write things that you want. Have a dream book. Make a list. Make a change. Maybe the place, the people, the surrounding. Try something new that will put a smile on your face. It’s a life, in school, in work, even in a marriage.
It’s never easy to move on, from people, from things, from yourselves, from habit. As one quote says “Time heals everything” but really time heals nothing unless you move along with it. Even me still trying to find way out from the black clouds above my head. I know this feeling that you feel, somehow depressing, somehow you just want to scream out, somehow you just want to be understood, to be listened. To have one hug. Yeah, maybe we only need a hug. I wish we can hug each other right now.
If you feel like a failure, don’t let that thought consumes you, we are not a failure. We are here for a reason. If you feel scared of failure, I know how it feels, I have dream and it scares me if I won’t be able to reach it, but as good quote say “If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough” what if my dreams aren’t big enough and it still scares me? Then probably I’m doomed. Haha kidding, give yourself a break, maybe we both are thinking too much. “the only failure is never to try” okay?
You are not the only one who hide emotion inside, you are not the only one. One good human being just told me all you can do is learn fRom mistakes, and move forward. We have to be happy again, we deserve to laugh as hard as we can until our tummy aches. We gonna get that happiness back. we have to.
You are not the only one. Let’s fight back this negative feelings, okay?
