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I Lost Someone To Suicide

A couple of months ago I lost a friend of mine. We had known each other 8 years roughly. He went though a hard time and committed suicide. The night he went missing I searched my entire town looking for him. It was almost midnight. The next morning his body was found.

I know I shouldn't blame myself for anything but ... I will always having a nagging voice in the back of my mind telling me I should of looked longer. I should of double checked certain spots. I should of tried harder. But I know that's not the case. I wouldn't of found him this was meant to happen.

I find living without his nerdy ways difficult and weird. It is something I will learn to deal with. I will continue to miss him everyday though.
I won't never forget him.
He will always be a part of me.
[c=#BF0080] This just sums up what a wonderful and lovely person you are <3 *hugs* and I and others are very PROUD of you and we appreciate a caring and loving person like you! It will get easier to deal with in time. One step at a time honey though, in your OWN time 馃槉鉂/c]
@ScarM3 [c=#BF0080] You are welcome and beleive me, I wouldnt say it if it was not the facts or truth 馃槉[/c]
Dusty101F
@CrystalSparkles ah that's such a comforting and kind message.
@Dusty101 [c=#BF0080]Thank you! you wrote this just as I posed in Q and A feeling like I wasnt making a difference *hugs* <3 Appreciate it ALOT 馃槝[/c]
Dusty101F
I think there is an in built mechanism in ourselves that make us think of the "what ifs"? It must have been such a horrible night for him, you and his loved ones.
You looked as hard as you could and nothing would have probably stopped him as he was in a completely different mindset than anyone without a suicidal mind. If it didn't happen that night it might have happened another night. Unless he would have completely healed from his suicidal thoughts. It's a difficult one! Please don't blame yourself. He wouldn't like you to be feeling like that. As others have said in the comments remember the fun and wonderful times with him. Hugs to you and distract your mind from blaming yourself. It's hard but just try!馃挌
ScarM326-30, F
@Dusty101 Thank you, the memories I have of him are always playing on repeat in my mind. He played a big part of my life. And helped me through so many difficult times I had. I'm trying to keep my head up and just take on every day as it comes.
I'm sorry for your lost, and you are right,there is nothing you could have done, keep.in mind the good times you had, all the laughter and silly moments, that's what he would have wanted. Did his name start by J?
@ScarM3 can I pm u?
ScarM326-30, F
@BlessHerHeart of course
@ScarM3 just did
SW-User
You did what you could. Sometimes we just can鈥檛 be everywhere doing everything.

Continue celebrating and honoring his life, I think he鈥檇 appreciate that.
ScarM326-30, F
@SW-User thank you. His life was a great one no matter how short it was.
JRVanguard26-30, M
I鈥檓 sorry for your loss, you can鈥檛 blame yourself for not finding him
ScarM326-30, F
@JRVanguard Thank you, and its hard not to blame myself.
JRVanguard26-30, M
@ScarM3 I understand, very well, one day you鈥檒l realize there鈥檚 nothing you could have done
This is heartbreaking. I hope that writing about it helps your own healing.
ScarM326-30, F
@CinnamonWorlds I feel like writing about it does help even though it is only a small amount. It's something right?.
I lost a close family member on New Years Day to suicide, I understand
DonaldTrumpet70-79, M
SorRRy To HEars, ItS HApPNS AlLS of UZ

 
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