loving your mom?

I know we are supposed to love our moms more then ever but my problem is my mom does not give me the impression that she loves me. i wanted to write a list of everything I love about my mom because i did a list about my dad and i could not think of anything for my mom that would be presentable to her, it was more like I love that she has brown eyes and hair because i inherited that, I love that she is not abusive, it just looks like i could not come up with anything better, and i actually couldnt. she dosent get that she hurts my feelings often and the problems she creates in my life she thinks are good things she is going the things she thinks are bad like discipline is actually good, im glad she disciplined me as a kid she dosen't discipline my sister at all. she is unemotional and she dosent care when i cry she just says stop your being too sensitive and dosent think she actually hurt ym feelings she says i cry just because i want to cry not because i feel bad. I know im supposed to love my mom but how do i love someone who dosent like me back?

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wunderluv · 51-55, M

I assure you that as long as there is no overt abuse physical or mental that and that the parent is basically mentally well that all parents your mom is included, love their kids and want the very best and sometimes just don't know how to show it in a better way. So ask her why she says what she does after heat of the moment. Try your best to always communicate calmly and kept your mom know what really matters to you and tell her when you need to be comforted by her when you cry and why

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wunderluv · 51-55, M

@Girlyfriendcollecting: I know precisely how that feels full on

Girlyfriendcollecting · F

@wunderluv: yea too bad there is nothing i can do about it😒

wunderluv · 51-55, M

Oh there's some that with an open heart and mind from both and your mom

LadyWioness · 56-60, F

Such a relatable post. My Mom openly showed favoritism. At first, it hurt me a lot. I figured out that it was transferance, because her Mom did it to her.

Unlearn · 41-45, M

Maybe she is not a emotional person. Empathy doesn't come to her naturally maybe. It's difficult for few people. I don't think she doesn't care for you, it's just that she can't sense your feelings. One needs to tell them explicitly about their feelings to her...so that she understands. I can relate with her to an extent, maybe because I am like her...

So communicate to her...don't expect her to read your mind :-)

Girlyfriendcollecting · F

dont expect her to read my mind I am way over explicit up to the point where I pretended to be depressed told her that I am going to kill myself and she thought i was joking.she didnt do anything about it, i have asked for a therapist form them for many years my mom says i dont need one and my dad says he can solve my problems. he didn't i said all i could it made him loose respect for mer because i said bad things about my mom.

PepsiCola · 26-30, F

I've never had a good relationship with mine. It's hard because it makes me doubt that I could ever be a loving mom when I don't even know what that would look like.

It's the hardest thing for young women to grow up without a loving mom. I hope you find something constructive to do with your spare time rather than go the dangerous route that I did.

l0stwithin · 26-30, M

you're not supposed to love your mom. But if you want to, then try to find such memories when you were very little. Maybe you can find some from then which would make you love her.

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l0stwithin · 26-30, M

@Girlyfriendcollecting: Write about the things she taught you. You can't write about how fun she is for sure. Maybe she'll be proud of the fact that you learnt from her so much if she read it.

Girlyfriendcollecting · F

@l0stwithin: thank you i will i still cann not show it to her because she says that discipline is bad and that everything i learned form her is wring she says she was stupid to teach me thoes things i have told her before that im glad i got discipline form her and its like she dosent listen and says the opposite.

l0stwithin · 26-30, M

@Girlyfriendcollecting:
you do not need to love her back. You shouldn't feel guilty for that. But maybe you can do something to prove something to her.

Chrisredfeild · 46-50, M

"Will i ever be good enough", read it. There will be "ah-ha" moments.

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