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Do you think people deserve kids?

I ask this because I see people who have children and treat them with no regard.

On the other hand, I have seen people who are unable to have kids and are desperate to have one. These people tend to raise children with a better morale and value them generously even if they aren't necessarily their own.
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
That's a nice idea.. and perhaps some of it is true.. we've all seen those who really shouldn't have kids.. and those who have them and appreciate them.. but.. I think we have to be careful of making those judgements.. generally we are just seeing a shapshot and we can't really tell how things are..

A tired mum, who's been up all night might snap at her kids.. doesn't mean she doesn't love them and treat them well most of the time.. and those who don't have them, might entirely change their tune once they have them.. and we've also seen those who struggled and eventually did have kids who then disregard them or over-protect them

I think the message here is.. parenting is hard, we make mistakes, we don't always get it right... none of us..
Beatbox34 · 31-35, M
@Adaydreambeliever I never said giving birth is an easy task. All I said was if people want the pleasure then don't give birth to children if you can't raise them.

You're right. If the person is poor then why do the mistake in the first place. The child doesn't deserve to be abandoned. I have read reports on the newspapers where a new born child would be left on the street. On the other hand there are people who want kids but can't have them. I understand the concept that pregnancies couldn't be prevent if a person was sexually assaulted. That's completely understandable. But I feel people should own up and take actions for their responsibilities.

My dad used to smoke a lot around us. I agree with you back in the day it was all fine. I say this because back in the day, things were different. The food back then backed your immunity. I doubt that that the same can be said today. I'll leave the smoking part. It's not responsible for the parent's own health at all. My dad died because of smoking.

I am not judging you at all. You may be a good mother. But what I want to say is procreation shouldn't be taken as a joke. People should take responsibility for the life they've created. I understand everything does not go as planned but the least a parent can do is be affectionate and not be lethargic around the kid. I know how hard it is to raise a kid single handedly. I may not be a parent but I've seen the struggles my mom has been through. I have seen how sick she got making selfless sacrifices for us. It was hard for her yet she never gave up. Had my father been a better man then the story might have been different.
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
@Beatbox34 I wasn't and am not having a go at you.. just throwing things out there to help us both *think* outside the box here..

Poor people often don't have the same choices we do.. and poor people may also be those who sell daughters, encourage them to prostitute, who aren't well educated, etc etc etc.. we just have to be so careful of judging wht we don't know.. poor people don't have the same luxury of choice we do.. The kinds of places where kids are abandoned on streets tend to be the kinds of places where women are raped, taken advantage, are poorly educated, and the act of abandoning a child/baby is an act of complete desperation which neither you nor I are capable or judging.. of.. etc.. etc..

As a parent myself .. I am endlessly humbled by the experience.. when I gave birth I *thought* I knew it all.. I thought kids sat quietly while you read them stories and sat there colouring quietly.. The thing is.. we can THINK we know we can raise them.. but honestly we can't EVER know.. things change, people change.. and we are one species that spends the longest time actually raising kids.. we can think we know something when they are one but find we didn't know diddly and things change by the time they are 14..

LOl I wasn't thinking you were judging me as a parent.. I wouldn't have imagined you would even think you could so rest assured on that one :P I am way better than some.. less good than others.. I am not perfect.. NO parent is..

I really do think.. that no one who doesn't have kids can judge on this.. I really don't.. and even then I don't think we can judge others because we just don't know their circumstances.. Here's a thing. it's actually proven that poorer people are more empathic than richer and that their families tend to have tighter bonds .. so.. those very people we might condemn might be doing a way better job than we think and maybe we don't know enough about what really works and what doesn't... a child who has every advantage will not necessarily have a happy childhood or turn out better.. it's just not that simple
Beatbox34 · 31-35, M
@Adaydreambeliever I agree when it comes to people who are poor. I didn't mention that. I did mention in my previous point that I cannot say the same for people who have been abused.

Take this example, there are two teenagers who have sex and give birth to a child. Now none of them are capable of raising a child so they send it to a foster family or to an orphanage. This is disgusting. In the country I reside, there are people who do this and they're not poor. This is why I said that. I agree with you that some people do it due to desperate measures.

I'm not a parent and I can't talk about that. But from the looks of what I've seen. Parenting is hard and nobody will find all the answers everywhere.

I do agree with you that people who come from poorer families have tighter bonds than the rich counterpart. I agree with you on the last point.

I just want to finish my point at this. I agree with all that you said but what I want to add is this. As you stated that not every parent is perfect, it's the same for a kid that not every kid is perfect. But being a parent, the parent should at least try their level best to mould the child and not give up on them. That is what I want to tell.
RubySoo · 56-60, F
Having worked with children in a main stream school for 14 years i dont even know why some people have kids. Some children are just burdens to their parents. Its heartbreaking. They certainly dont deserve them.
NCCindy · 36-40, F
@RubySoo And then there are those who want to have kids more than anything and are having problems making it happen !!!
RubySoo · 56-60, F
@NCCindy yeap. Very sad. X
Dusty101 · F
Not when the parents are strung out on drugs all day starting fights, acting aggressive everywhere they go.. Children do not deserve that type of upbringing and those moranic parents don't deserve them!
MougyWolf · 36-40, M
To be honest, I'm going to take an unpopular opinion here and say that no, because the world is overpopulated.
People deserve families and mostly get bad substitutes. That issue has to be examined first.
nedkelly · 61-69, M
The sad part is, some cultures just breed like animals and are happy to sit back and collect WELFARE and MORE WELFARE - example Muslims
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
@nedkelly ha ha I nearly choked with amusement here.. Muslims don't have welfare!
nedkelly · 61-69, M
@Adaydreambeliever In Australia they love welfare and the payments they receive
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
@nedkelly well, I can't comment as I don't know the situation there.. I'd have to see stats and figs to understand that situation better.
SW-User
Not everybody should have children.
Deserve ? No. [b]Children[/b] deserve to have responsible and loving parents.
Beatbox34 · 31-35, M
@bijouxbroussard I agree.
You should need to show a high school graduation certificate and prove you can raise it.. not the tax payer ✌️
Beatbox34 · 31-35, M
@TheOneyouwerewarnedabout Reproduction isn't difficult. Raising the kid so that he makes an example of himself for society to follow is difficult.
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
@TheOneyouwerewarnedabout I know you won't agree but one might also recognise that having children is a necessary investment in the country too.. it benefits everyone as those kids are the ones who grow up and work and help pay the massive pension bills we see now that people live longer.. it's also those kids who drive the economy when they go out to work.. Investing in those kids helps provide an educated workforce which helps countries stay ahead.
MartinTheFirst · 22-25, M
I believe you're forever in debt to your children if you decide to bring them to life.
MartinTheFirst · 22-25, M
I think he seems like a pretty good dad, lol.
[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1Fn63F5YNw&t=162s]

 
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