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Why do most people try to keep me away from my mother?

My family and friends warned me about staying with my mother and how she only thinks of herself. She never calls, return calls, did drugs in the past and breaks promises. I always wanted my mother but she never wants me. My mom told me the real reason why she walked out on is. It's because I had a disability and she didn't want a disabled child. She said I was a mistake. I'm trying to make things work but it just didnt wrk out! I'll never get my mom to parent me. I want my mother!! I can't stay with her! I guess that's why my dad kept trying to keep me from my mother and he said I don't need her and she doesn't care about us.
I love mom but she doesn't love me as a daughter at all. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I'm going home Sunday morning. Should I give up on my mom? I can't even talk to her or look at her anymore.

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NicoleA · 26-30, F

Yes you really should....

When people treat you like they don’t care, you better fucking believe it. And you shouldn’t give a damn either. I know this seems harsh, because she is your mother, but you don’t deserve to be mistreated you deserve people who love you, people who deserve you.

Over the years I’ve learned. That blood doesn’t necessarily mean family, realize that. Also realize that nobody deserves to be in toxic relationship, walk away from people that make it toxic, better yet, fucking run.

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SStarfish ·

Because she's a selfish person

and not really a mother to you even tho technically biologically she's your mother.. I reality she's just a selfish bitch who probly wishes she killed/aborted you before you were born

You're better off forgetting about her .. She's not a real mom

Just listen to your dad and appreciate your dad.. Sorry 😕

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Khenpal1 · M

If she doesn't care its hard, but keep some contact with her , when she gets older she may have heart change.

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Khenpal1 · M

@EmptyGirl2001 completely understand you.

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bijouxbroussard · F

Sounds like they’ve tried to keep you away because they didn’t want you to be deeply hurt. But based upon your posts you had to find out for yourself. Which is okay, sometimes we can’t believe something until [b]we[/b] see it for ourselves. You can’t make her into the mother she should’ve been to you. Your choices are to meet her where she is, limitations and all, or move on. Either way, none of it is [b]your[/b] fault or failing, it’s literally [b]her[/b], not you. Your only task is to make peace with the reality so you can live your life.

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bijouxbroussard · F

@EmptyGirl2001 I understand. But that wasn’t in the cards, unfortunately. Were there others in your family who stepped up, aunts, grandmother, etc. ? I don’t know how old you are, but part of growing up is seeing things for what they are. You can’t make her into the loving mother you deserved, that isn’t who she is. Your choices are accepting her, faults and all, with your eyes open (while protecting your heart) or if she’s too toxic, putting distance between you.

Expecting her to change risks your continuing to be disappointed and heartbroken. Envying your friends and wishing for what isn’t, wastes your time. And life is just too short.
Take another look at the people who were there and tried to protect you from the reality of the woman who gave birth to you and bailed.

In one of your posts you mention that she admitted why she left. So
you know the truth from her own mouth. Doesn’t necessarily make her a bad person, just a very [b]weak[/b] and irresponsible one. She gave you your life, but it’s [b]yours[/b] now, and you can choose not to let her destroy it. Honestly, you might consider counseling to make peace with this and put things in perspective. It couldn’t hurt. 🙁

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