Do you question/remind your parents over their mistakes in raising you? do you re

No one is perfect and parents always make mistakes even with the best of intentions having in heart and mind. I think it is one of the most difficult job in the world.

Is it right to remind them of their mess and mistakes in the age where they cannot do much accept feel guilty.

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Mamapolo2016 · F

My parents did the best they knew how and I can point to very few things that went wrong in my life I would even question them about. If parents are loving parents and grownups themselves they do their best for their children.

Once you have raised your own children and have an idea what they blame YOU for, and how they are turning out, it often puts a whole different spin on things.

As far as I myself am concerned, a lot of parental actions made a lot more sense when I wasn't seeing the world through my own childish eyes. Moreover, to a great extent, by the time I'm thirty or so, I am no longer my parents' child - I am the person I've made out of my parents' child and most of the blame is mine.

Always remember that your parents had parents too.

aaaabbbb

@Mamapolo2016 absolutely, we all learn as we grow older that making choices is not the easiest part of parenthood.

Mamapolo2016 · F

@aaaabbbb Also consider, especially in previous generations, most parents had children BEFORE they learned most of the important stuff!

aaaabbbb

@Mamapolo2016 very true.

Keraunos · 36-40, M

Nah. What grievances I have with my own parents basically come down to the results of fairly low self-awareness and a disinclination to think things through before acting on their part, and those same qualities render futile any effort to criticize them.

aaaabbbb

@Keraunos sorry to hear that, very well put. What do you do?

Keraunos · 36-40, M

@aaaabbbb Nothing to be sorry about, they're not bad folks by a long shot. They're just frustrating, because they both possess intelligence well within the 99th percentile, but are essentially just couch potatoes/home improvement hobbyists who never seem to have put their intellects to use in either serious introspection or learning about the world for as long as they've lived. And that laziness when it comes to thought led to a fair number of things going "wrong", which probably would have been well within the domain of acceptable human error if they just weren't that bright, but should have been easily preventable for them.

I'm not sure what the relevance is, but if you're asking about the boring things I do to earn stable income, I quit a warehousing/manual labor job I've had for some years a little over a week ago over medical issues. Although I remain alert for other opportunities, the most likely outcome of that is that I'll just return to that same job in a slightly different capacity in a month or so.

TURTLEGOD

My mom always asks me "what do you think of me as a parent?" Could i have done better? Is there anything you didnt like, etc. Etc. And i always avoid answering because she does make herself feel guilty and because our family already judges her a lot for the choices my brother and sister have made.
While i do believe mistakes have been made and there are things she could have done better i would never tell her that.
She raised three of us alone and im sure she did the best she could at those times and still is.
As you said theres no need to make her ruminate on things that cant be changed.
I just let her know i love her for what she has done and for being human enough to acknowledge she too has flaws.

aaaabbbb

@TURTLEGOD i can understand it and awesome job for dealing her with kindness and love.

SW-User

I don’t need to because they keep blaming each other over why I’m losing at life lmao

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SW-User

@aaaabbbb college

aaaabbbb

@SW-User at least you got thru college, what did you study?

SW-User

@aaaabbbb Software Development, Bachelors degrees are just entry level these days so it doesn’t mean much

Phire1 · 51-55, F

I would need a Ouija board to do that

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