I Am Married But Lonely

@airzzm: I totally understand that! Try a little bit at a time. See a therapist, start doing something new that you have always wanted to try, start saving money in a private bank account, etc... It may seem big now, but if you do a tiny bit every day then you will eventually succeed. I made friends online who help keep me sane.

@Laifu1: I think a therapist is a good idea. I saw one many years before and she really helped me. I wouldn't even know how to go about seeing one now as I don't know if my insurance takes it. The saving money little by little is being done too. :-(

@airzzm: Your insurance company should have a list of therapists that take their insurance online

@ap199 Thanks so much for the advice and honest answer. I definitely feel the same: bored, deprived, lonely. These last past several yrs I've shut down. He notices, but ignores it for the most part, not because he doesn't care, but because he doesn't know what to do. I think I may need to get out as well, just as you had. I know it's important to do all that you can, but what if there's nothing even to hold on to? I don't love him, I haven't for a very long time...I just don't know what to do...

@airzzm Well you certainly deserve more. Well you certainly deserve more. Are there kids involved? I’ve seen many times were kids enter a couples life and they become so busy being parents but they forget to be husband and wife. Has this happened? I the busy day today life of work and taking care of kids can make everything feel like a chore and there’s nothing left of a marriage. Make sure you were making time for him one on one. You say that your love for him has died. Love is a condition that requires nurturing. If left alone it will die. But it will also come back. At one point you didn’t love him and then you did. What brought you to loving him? Consider rediscovering him and paying more attention to him. Be polite and friendly even if it seems awkward. Give it some time, he may react confused. But eventually he will catch on.

The other hand, if there’s no kids involved, and you’re not interested in remembering why you fell in love with him to begin with, then maybe you’ve convinced yourself and that it’s not worth fighting for. Make sure you truly are not simply looking for the next chapter

keep in mind, good relationships take work. When you met, you had to work to attract him. He had to work to attract you. I often couples stop working. They assume the relationship will carry-on well they put their efforts elsewhere. Wrong. Consider wearing something sexy the next time you’re working around the house. He may ask you, why are you dressed that way? Simply reply, because I thought you might like it. In a world where we are trying to remove gender biased, it is more common that would be coming more and more bored with each other.

Is the male red cardinal bright red simply by chance? Absolutely not, or he may not reproduce. It’s his job to be flashy a noticeable to attract a suitable female. This continues in many species. What makes humans any different? From a man’s perspective, women are uniquely beautiful. They develop round ample breasts and hips with curves that Into our primal core instinct to reproduce. Women may wear revealing clothing to accentuate those curves. This is not sexist. This is human and natural. The man being driven by testosterone and primal he wire Women may wear revealing clothing and high heels to accentuate those curves. This is not sexist. This is human and natural. The man, being driven by testosterone and instinctively over theoretically millions of years of conditioning the brain to responding intimately to the site of a woman who bears the Desire and ability to reproduce.

Put on a tight dress that’s a little too short. Wear some heels and have some fun. And thank positive. Don’t expect immediate results. He’s going to be confused at first. Do this a couple times a week for a few months. If after a few months he’s not catching on, wear that same outfit and go out and find a new man who appreciates it :-)

If you need someone to talk to then I'd be happy to talk whether we talk here, text, email or whatever. You seem to need a support group to help you and I am offering. It's up to you @airzzm:

Thanks Brian. I might just take you up on that offer. I'm in need of friends and a support system at the moment...

Message me if you decide you are interested @airzzm:

@melbeacher Thank you so much, keep your head up and best of luck with you as well. I know relationships are tough and a lot of work...

I cheated because I couldn't take it...I know shame one me

Not really. People cheat because they seek more of something of which they don't currently have. It happens.

It felt amazing to lol

@artistinresidence I've realized a long time ago that being in the wrong kind of relationship makes you more lonely than fulfilled... :'(

i completely understand that since i was in one for 14 years. turned out she liked guys instead. why do you think you are in the wrong relationship? @airzzm