How do I stop being so sensitive to this?

I have this guy friend who is like a brother to me. Thing is, one of my close friends doesn't like him, and another girl I hang out with but don't really consider her a friend anymore doesn't like him either. Now, I know that if someone says something bad about him, he says he doesn't care. However, it annoys me a lot whenever they say something mean/rude about him. Especially because he's been there for me when they haven't been.

The girl who I'm not really friends with brought up how I don't like one of her friends for no reason, but there is a reason. Anyway, she made it seem like I just dislike people without having an explanation for it. She told two other people this as well...which I don't understand because I never bring up her not liking my guy friend or make her feel crappy for it? And I knew I couldn't say anything back because I'd just be digging myself into a deeper hole.

Anyway, I guess it's just hard hearing people say mean things about him because I care about him a lot. How do I avoid this though?

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FORMERLYbatovn · 56-60, M

I learned many years ago that you are not gonna please everyone, or make everyone happy. Many people in YOUR life are not meant to get along with each other, and thats ok. The best thing you can do is value YOUR opinion of the young man and when others make comments about him, simply ask them to refrain from that in your presence. You will possibly forced to make a choice between friends, and that isnt a reflection on you but on them. The young lady that is no longer considered a friend really has no dog in the fight and her opinion shouldnt carry much, if any weight. At the same time, understand that the person you dont like doesnt have to be a part of your circle either......Ive learned to tolerate those I need to and to be polite but very guarded and reveal nothing to them. I wish you well with this!

morrgin · F

If he is your friend then you stand up for him. You do it politely though. If you are around anyone who starts talking bad about him you interrupt them as soon as they start and you say in a firm strong voice that he is your friend and you don't want to hear anyone talking bad about him. If they persist then you leave.

MerryMilkshake · 22-25, M

Don't throw away friends like some have suggested, that's not a nice thing to do.

If it bothers you that your friends are saying something like this then mention it to them. Don't do it for your guy friend, do it for yourself bc it bothers you.

Redstar · 36-40, M

That is exactly when you could have said something back. Because she's accusing you of doing something that she does. Pisses me off when people do that.
Just tell her to fuck off and then stop hanging around her, since she isn't your friend anyway.

eMortal · M

It's one of those situations where's girls think they have to all approve before one of them can hangout with a new person. Lol.
For girls your age, it's usually a matter of beauty and social status. That's what usually sets them off. That can't say aloud cuz it'll them look shallow.

Montanaman · M

Get new friends. Keep your guy friend.👍🤗

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